One of our biggest goals at Eterneva is to lean in during hard times, to ask questions, to engage, to hold space for those things that give us grief, anxiety, and make us emotional.
Typically, we do that for people who have lost their absolute favorite relationships and loved ones. We hope to serve as a beacon of light –– giving both the grief and the joy permission to be experienced through the next days, weeks, and years as the next chapters unfold.
Like so many others, we don’t have much experience with pandemics. Yet, in these times, the same resilient mindset and need to hold space remain.
This is the time to lean in to the hard things, to talk with friends and family, to practice gratefulness and build new routines and habits in the wake of those that have been disrupted.
This is a type of grief –– and for all those already grieving, this kind of event can feel even more overwhelming. So, here are the mentalities, the practices, and meditations and more that the Eterneva team is using for our own self-care during these worrying times.
We hope you can use them as well to calm your mind, control your emotions (pretty much the only thing you can control right now!), lean in to help others however you can, and hold space for the fear while living the best version of you that is possible right now.
Your Mind is Yours to Control
The only thing any of us can control is our own mind.
- The language we use to talk to ourselves is important. It is what we believe. It is who we become.
- What we feed our brain matters –– whether it is frightening news or a nice book by someone we admire.
These things change our mindset, and as a result, how we show up in our lives for ourselves, those we love, and those we come across.
Here are 7 mindset best practices for times like these:
1. Limit news intake.
Know enough to be informed, especially about your local area, and do what you can to not let it become an obsession. Again, what you feed your brain matters. If you end up down a rabbit hole of bad news –– and that rabbit hole is long and deep as I’m sure we all know –– it will be hard to pull yourself out.
Instead, find news on channels like NPR or the CDC’s website. Make sure you know what is going on in your community. Know what you can do to help –– wash your hands, stay home if you feel sick, etc.
Other than that, don’t spend more than half an hour a day seeking out news. Use this time to feed your brain in other ways. Watch old movies you love. Pick up a book. Turn on a podcast.
In fact, The School of Life podcast is one of our favorite right now, especially these episodes:
2. Don’t watch the market.
The market is going on a rollercoaster and so is your 401K.
Just remember, the economy on average returns 8-9% over the long run! It’ll self-correct.
There is no point in pulling up your investment information right now. This is not a time to panic about it. Instead, rest assured that our economy goes through events like this –– even pandemics! –– and recovers over time.
Avoid looking at those numbers now. It isn’t helpful for your mindset amongst everything else.
3. Meditate in the morning.
Meditation is hands down the best investment of your time every single day. Ten minutes in the morning can reset your mind and body, and set up your day for greatness and calm. Our team highly recommends the Calm app, or Deepak Chopra’s 21 day meditation program.
If paying for these programs is a concern, there are free resources on YouTube. Here is one such free resource, a morning meditation, from Deepak Chopra:
4. Be careful about your language and focus.
What are the messages you’re telling yourself? Stand guard at the door of your mind! The words and language you use to talk to yourself and others is what you believe, it is who you are. The vibrations bounce through your body and bones, and you begin to live it.
Stand guard. Be conscious of what you are telling yourself –– and focus on a mantra that reminds you that you are resilient, strong, and capable of anything, including hard things.
What we focus on is what we feel. This is why reading too much news or watching the market right now causes too much anxiety. It becomes our focus, and then we are panicked.
Instead, focus on your wellbeing, on your books, on your laundry, on your loved ones. Use this extra time away from others to use social media in positive ways, to take that bath and do that face mask, to cook the meal you’ve wanted to try, to watch that series you’ve heard so much about (Outlander for me!).
5. Work on emotional mastery.
The LeBron James Calm series is fantastic! The entire Eterneva team has listened to the first episode, and are lining up in hoards to listen to the rest.
LeBron has such deep experience in stressful situations, and has done incredible work to consistently master those situations and deliver unbelievable outcomes.
Plus, his voice is incredibly soothing!
For emotional mastery, the topic he teaches on, he walks you through why this is so important. All of us have our thing we are going through. Yes, there is a pandemic. But, a lot of us are also going through grief, or anxiety for an exam, or worry about being far from family, or whatever it is.
We all have things. And the only way any of us will be successful at those things is to focus, but you can’t focus if you don’t have emotional mastery.
Here are a few steps you can take to get yourself in a good head space so you can focus on what steps are needed to accomplish your goals:
- Fear does not serve you.
Fear has biological and helpful psychological roots, but fear doesn’t serve you to accomplish your goals. Mostly, fear paralyzes you. It makes decisions harder, maybe even impossible. It clouds the brain. Fear does not serve you. It does not propel you. It does not need your focus on your attention.
- Take a deep breath.
To put fear to bed, take a deep breath. If our bodies were machines, breath is the electricity that runs them. Our breath determines how our body works and how it reacts. Long, deep breaths tell our body and mind that everything is OK. That there is nothing to fear. That we got this. Take a deep breath before you take the next action.
- Put your blinders on.
Whatever it is you need to accomplish to do whatever your thing is, put your blinders on to get it done. There are thousands of little things constantly trying to get your attention. Your email. Your laundry. Your friend who is texting you concerned about what they say on TV. Maybe you had an argument with your spouse, or your mom.
All of that needs to drop to the back of your mind. To accomplish this task, to get this job done, to do what needs to be done, none of that can be there. You need to put on the blinders. All that exists is you and what you need to do.
All of that will come flooding back later after you make this shot, after you close this deal, after you pass that exam. That is when you can better deal with it, in a better headspace with a win under your belt.
- Strive for excellence.
Striving for excellence is a focus exercise. You won’t always achieve it, but you can always be bettering yourself.
Fear plays on the past for present paralyzation. Striving for excellence uses the past as inspiration for the present.
The only moment you have is right now. It doesn’t matter if you’ve been here before and it didn’t go well then. It only matters right now. This moment has never been before and it will never be again. What will you do in it now to strive for excellence, to use this moment to propel yourself forward in your relationship goals, your work goals, your life goals?
6. Simplify and maximize.
What are the highest value activities you can do right now? How can you do more with less? We have all been incredibly lucky to live the last decade in abundance. Where can we trim the fat?
Days of abundance will come again, as will days of less. How we live in each of those times is important, and understanding our essentials versus our nice-to-haves is, too.
7. Gratitude is the antidote to fear.
Gratitude is the great antidote to fear. It focuses your mind on what you have, and all the positives this life brings –– both from good and bad events. To strengthen this muscle, because gratitude is a muscle, practice writing in a gratitude journal. You can order one off of Amazon, or just use the following daily prompts on a piece of paper or even a computer or your smartphone at home:
- Three Things I Am Grateful For Today
- Three Things I Want to Accomplish Today
Take Care of Yourself
We are in a worldwide health pandemic. It is incredibly important to take care of yourself right now. Here are some of the best tips we’ve heard, and would like to share (most of hiwhc, you’ve also probably heard!):
- Wash your hands a lot: 20 seconds with hot water and soap
- Drink a lot of water!
- Take care of your immune system: Take elderberry. Workout. Don’t smoke or vape.
- Stock up: Non perishable food. Water. Soap and/or hand sanitizer.
- If you feel any symptoms: Call the doctor - don’t go into hospital. Do a morning 10 second breath test. You should be able to hold your breath for 10 seconds. If you can’t, call the doctor.
And remember, we are here! We are still working. We are by our phones and emails and are ready and happy to help as needed. As are so many others around the globe. None of us are in this alone.