The Eterneva team is committed to sharing real stories that help celebrate the remarkable lives of loved ones who have passed and have started their new journey as a memorial diamond. These real stories of the little things are here to help connect one another, spark joy, inspire gratitude, and move us forward together.
We had the opportunity to catch up with Cogey, the daughter of Wyndie, who is currently working with our team at Eterneva to turn her remarkable mother’s ashes into a bright and shining diamond.
Cogey is embarking on a brand new journey with her remarkable mom. Not only is she turning her mom into a beautiful one-of-a-kind diamond, but she’s also inviting us to join her as she travels to recreate her mom’s old photos. Cogey is speaking from the heart and giving all of us a glimpse into her unique and beautiful journey with grief.
The Remarkable Legacy of Wyndie
Wyndie’s personality was fun, very kind, and very generous. Everything she did was from the heart and wonderfully genuine. What you saw is what you got. What came out of her mouth was exactly what she thought and felt.
“She was just such a wonderful, like, genuine person. And that’s something that I’ve always appreciated about her. I love that. I think that’s like a trait that I most admire in people.” – Cogey
She didn’t just have one thing in particular she loved to do. She loved to go dancing, thrift store shopping, watching her crime shows, reading, and just being with her friends.
“The thing that stands out the most as her favorite thing to do was just to be with other people and to share, just share her world with someone that she loved and share the things that she used to do with the people that she loved in her life.” – Cogey
Cogey has the most photos of her mom spending time with her friends. Wyndie was a big partier, but not in a drinking way. She didn’t really like to drink, but she did enjoy just being out with people.
Wyndie was a mom to four kids and wife to a business owner. She ensured all of her kids got to experience a lot of different things and that she was there for every recital, every game, everything.
She was very supportive of her daughter, Cogey, and gave her help whenever the opportunity presented itself. While the dynamic duo had plenty of amazing memories together, one that sticks out to Cogey was planning her DIY wedding in Joshua Tree together.
“It was really cool… The memory that I cherish most was the night before the wedding. We slept together in the same bed and then we got ready together the next day and I did her hair and or makeup and stuff, and it was just such a special time for both of us. I think just to really be with each other. And she was just celebrating me and being really, really supportive of me and I just loved spending that time with her.” – Cogey
The Little Things
With a relationship as special as Cogey and Wyndie’s, it’s no surprise that Cogey has many little things she misses about her mom. When it came to Cogey and Wyndie’s relationship, Cogey could always count on her mom to tell it how it is and give great advice, even when it was hard to hear.
“My mom had the funniest habit, and I do think it’s because her Venus was in Virgo that every time you would bring something up, she would just be like, ‘Oh, well, I know this way to kind of like, fix that or remedy that or make it better somehow.’ The most annoying thing was that she was always right. She was always right. But it was like, you know, in your mind, you have it all settled, set out and you have it all figured out and stuff. And then she comes in with this very logical explanation of why it needs to be done differently. Yes, I do miss that.” – Cogey
Cogey remembers her mom always drinking the lightest roast coffee possible, almost like water, with a lot of milk. It was barely coffee. But the coffee didn’t need to be strong, because Wyndie’s love for her daughter was strong enough.
“If I would ever go over to her house and fall asleep on her couch or something, she would go in her little blanket cabinet to cover me with a blanket. You know, that’s one of the little things that I just miss the most.” – Cogey
Wyndie was down to talk whenever. Cogey could call her mom in the middle of the night, middle of the day, in the morning, whenever. And even if she was dead asleep, she would wake up to talk about whatever she wanted to talk about. She was very, very kind, and very generous.
Cogey remembers the little things fondly. Just like when Wyndie would sing like no one was listening.
“Those little things… She used to listen to music with her headphones on and I don’t think it ever occurred to her that everyone else can’t hear the music because she would sing really loudly. And it would just be her voice, you know, from the outside of the headphones listening in. She had her headphones and she’s singing Bennie and the Jets by Elton John, and she’s like Bennie, Bennie and the jets. You know, she’s not great. She’s not a good singer. But I recorded it and uploaded it on MySpace Music. And then our elementary school teacher commented on it and he was like, I just made that my ringtone. And when she found out, like years later, she was so mad.” – Cogey
Celebrating Wyndie’s Remarkable Life As A Forever Diamond
Cogey is embarking on a brand new journey with her remarkable mom. Not only is she turning her mom into a beautiful one-of-a-kind diamond that she can travel the world with, but she’s also inviting us to join her as she recreates her mom’s old photos.
“The amazing team at Eterneva has been so gracious and open to my ideas to celebrate my mom’s life while her diamond is being made and I decided that while it’s growing, I’m going to sort through my moms photo albums and retrace her steps on her journey from her home town in Trenton, New Jersey, down to Florida, and then all the way to California where she stayed for the rest of her life.” – Cogey
While designing a memorial diamond that uniquely tells her mom’s story and recreating special photos and memories, Cogey is speaking from the heart and giving all of us a glimpse into her unique and beautiful journey with grief.
“I can’t even begin to describe how big my feelings are about having such a precious sustainable heirloom, like this incredible, beautiful reminder of how bright her light truly was… it’s so much and I’m beside myself with emotions about it.
Celebrating her life with everyone via my Instagram platform has been so moving, and I know this is going to be such a meaningful project. I’m really excited to share it with you over the next few months. ” – Cogey
A Path Forward
Having a kind, supportive, and fearless mother as wise as Wyndie has left an impact on Cogey and countless others. While losing a mother is the biggest loss Cogey has faced in her life, she navigates her grief with the independence and resilience her mother instilled in her from a young age to be fearless in life and enjoy it with loved ones.
“My mom completely impacted my life in the way that she was just very, very forceful about her children being very fearless about life. She wanted us to try everything. She has impacted my life in the greatest way possible.”
Whether it was soccer, ballet, or anything else, Wyndie always supported her kids trying new things to get the most out of life.
“She made it possible for us to try and do anything so that we could live fearlessly for the rest of our lives. And she, just like completely set us up for success in that way. And that is something that I will forever be grateful for, because I wouldn’t be the person that I am today, just kind of living this weird artist lifestyle, you know, and not having a lot of anxiety about it because my mom just always, always believed that you should just do what you want. Leap and the net will appear kind of a thing.”
There is no wrong way to grieve.
Through the difficult process of losing someone as close as her mom, Cogey has learned a lot about grief.
“Grieving is very different for everyone and I think that when you are grieving, you shouldn’t feel guilty about the way that you’re doing it because you know you need to take the time for yourself.
Take all the days, weeks, months in order to feel at peace with what happened. The people who are in your life and surround you will support you and they’ll be there for you when you decide and you feel a little bit better, feel like going out more. For me personally, I have a tendency to isolate, you know, if I don’t feel right and I don’t feel like faking it with people just for the sake of being social and stuff. My friends have been very, very understanding of that”
Cogey goes on to share that she thinks it’s healthy for people to have a support group and to reach out when sad feelings inevitably occur.
“It helps you feel less sad about it to talk to people about it and then talking about your loved one is helpful in the grieving process. Grieving is like a zig zag and there’s no straight line. You can’t be blind to feeling better about it, so you just have to lean into it and take it day by day.”
What are your little things?
We’re on a mission to change a culture around death, grief, and remembrance at Eterneva. We believe the little things shared with a loved one are some of the most important and impactful treasures in life. We want to help you find solace on your grieving journey by embracing the little things you shared with your loved one that left a lasting impression.
And for those who aren’t on a grieving journey, this is for you too! Who are the most precious people in your life and what are their little things? Through loss we learn about life. So how can you learn from Hope and Dustin’s remarkable love to practice presence and gratitude the next time your loved one slurps their coffee or has their silly quirk?
Join us by sharing “that one time they…” or “I remember how they would…” about your loved ones. We can’t wait to hear just how special your loved one is to you and the little things that have made a big impact on your life. We want to share your favorite “little things” about your loved ones, so please share on Instagram with the hashtag #TLTeterneva for a chance to be featured on our account!